Devotional

My mom works in a church office and has to periodically put together a devotional to share with the staff. A couple of weeks ago, she shared the devotional she wrote with me since it was inspired by time spent with Sutton. I loved it and wanted to share it here as well. So here it is...

1 John 3:1:  NIV: See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!

A couple of weekends ago, our grandson, Sutton, age 3, spent 24 hours with us.  We had invited him to come over for a weekend, and we talked for weeks ahead of time about all the fun stuff we were going to do.  He was very excited about it.  This was to be the first time he would be away from home overnight without his parents.  As they prepared him for this day, he confidently told them that he wanted to stay at Grandma’s house forever!  So when the day finally came, Gina brought him, with all kinds of instructions for us on his habits and what he liked to eat and when he should nap and how to mix his apple juice and how to take him to the bathroom and when he should go to bed and bedtime routines and when he would get up in the morning, and on and on.  I think she was having a harder time with this than Sutton – he was ready for her to leave, so he could start doing all the fun stuff with Grandpa and Grandma!  She barely got a hug and kiss from him before she left! 

We started our time together at the park with a picnic lunch.  We fed cheetos to the ducks and squirrels.  We played on the playground equipment.  (We found out that Sutton LOVES to swing!)  Back at home, Bruce took him on a tractor ride.  We played on the fire engine that Bruce built in the back yard.  We played games.  We read books.  We took a nap.  We played with cars.  (Sutton LOVES cars!)  We watched a movie.  We had a great, great time!  The next morning, I told him that pretty soon we would take him home.  He assured us that that he wasn’t ready to go and that he would tell us when it was time!  It finally took a phone call to his mommy and a little coaxing before he agreed to go home.

As I spent time with Sutton that weekend, I thought about how he is such a precious child to us.  It made me think that that’s the way I am to God.  I am His precious child. God loves me and watches me and wants to spend time with me, just as we did with Sutton. 

Matthew 18:3:  And he said: "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

When Jesus says we must become like children to enter the kingdom of heaven, what does that mean?  Again, I think about Sutton and the characteristics of children.  They have a pure heart.  They are dependent upon others.  They are trusting.  They believe what you tell them.  They are spontaneous.  They are teachable.  They ask questions. They want to be loved.  They are honest.  They have no worldly ambition or lust for power.  These must be the things that God desires from His children - a pure, trusting heart, a dependency on Him, a willingness to seek and learn, and a simple childlike belief.

Reading again I John 3:1, this time from The Message:  What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it—we’re called children of God! That’s who we really are.

And here's a photo my mom took of the tractor ride with Papa Bruce:

Two Songs

There are two songs that have meant so much to me lately, and I thought I'd share them, in case they could help anyone else.

The first one is called "Your Hands" by JJ Heller. I may have posted about this song before, I can't remember, but it's amazing. Just thinking back to all those feelings I was having after the miscarriage and then when we were trying to get pregnant again. Trying to make sense of everything. The words to this are so powerful.

It was also inspirational during the time my mom was having her bout with lymphoma. I didn't blog much about that because she didn't want a lot of attention, but it was scary. It helps to remember that through everything, Heaven stands.

The second song is "Hold My Heart" by Tenth Avenue North. Wow. I have a strong reaction when I hear this song. Early on during this pregnancy, you may remember that I spotted for a few days. I was so scared. I finally insisted on a sonogram to check on the baby, and on the way there, Rachael played this song for me. It was hard and good to hear all at the same time, and she had to hold my hand as I drove to the doctor's office through the tears.

Today

I had a bit of a hard time today.

I decided to finally clean out the nursery. It'd kind of become a junk room. We had unpacked boxes in there from when we moved a year and a half ago. It was a place I'd thrown items that were to be "dealt with later."

I came across the stuffed bear my mother-in-law gave me to help comfort my empty arms after our miscarriage. The cards from people during that time who were praying for us. The sonogram picture of our first baby.

I lost it.

There are so many strong emotions still associated with our loss. Sadness that I have a baby I never got to meet. Happiness that I'll one day meet her in heaven. Guilt at being so happy about the new baby and not thinking about the first one as often as I should.

It's good to cry. It's good to remember. But thinking over the past eight months, all we've been through, the hurdles we've faced... I'm so thankful. Jesus is our Redeemer. The Giver of Life, of Hope.

Then I read this great devotional tonight.

From Streams in the Desert:

Is there ever really any reason to be downcast? Actually, there are two reasons, but only two. If we were still unbelievers, we would have a reason to be downcast; or if we have been converted but continue to live in sin, we are downcast as a consequence.

Except for these two conditions, there is never a reason to be downcast, for everything else may be brought to God "by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving" (Phil. 4:6)...

...Our work is to lay our petitions before the Lord, and in childlike simplicity to pour out our hearts before him, saying, "I do not deserve that You should hear me and answer my requests, but for the sake of my precious Lord Jesus; for his sake, answer my prayer. And give me grace to wait patiently until it pleases You to grant my petition. For I believe You will do it in Your own time and way."

"For I will yet praise him" (Ps. 43:5). More prayer, more exercising of our faith, and more patient waiting leads to blessings - abundant blessings. I have found it to be true many hundreds of times, and therefore I continually say to myself, "Put your hope in God."

Proverb

I have shown you the way

that makes sense;

I have guided you

along the right path.

Your road won't be blocked,

and you won't stumble

when you run.

Hold firmly to my teaching

and never let go.

It will mean life for you.

-Proverbs 4:11-13

Romans 8:38-39

You know how you can hear a verse so many times that it becomes normal and you're more concerned with remembering the words than taking away the meaning? My devotional today from the book Hope by Nancy Guthrie had a really great take on Romans 8:38-39:

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life [not cancer, a car accident, crime, or calamity], neither angels nor demons [not evil in the media or crazed psychopaths], neither the present nor the future [not any current crisis or any tragedy that may be in my future], nor any powers [not a demanding boss, a cruel dictator, or a blood-thirsty terrorist], neither height nor depth [not winning the lottery or losing my life savings], nor anything else in all creation [not a hole in the ozone, a forest fire or a hurricane, a hungry shark or a killer bee] will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

October 23 Devotional

Excerpt from Streams in the Desert:

"Not one word has failed of all the good promises he gave. (1 Kings 8:56)

Someday we will understand that God has a reason behind every no He gives us through the course of our lives. Yet even in this life, He always makes it up to us. When God's people are worried and concerned that their prayers are not being answered, how often we have seen Him working to answer them in a far greater way! Occasionally we catch a glimpse of this, but the complete revelation of it will not be seen until later.

If God says yes to our prayer, dear heart,
And the sunlight is golden, the sky is blue,
While the smooth road beckons to me and you,
And songbirds are singing as on we go,
Pausing to pick the flowers at our feet,
Stopping to drink of the streams that we meet,
Happy, more happy, our journey will grow,
If God says yes to our prayer, dear heart.

If God says no to our prayer, dear heart,
And the clouds hang heavy and dull and gray;
If the rough rocks hinder and block the way,
While the sharp winds pierce us and sting with cold;
Yet, dear, there is home at the journey's end,
And these are the trials the Father does send
To draw us as sheep to His Heavenly fold,
If God says no to our prayer, dear heart."

Unanswered?

Unanswered yet the prayer your lips have pleaded
In agony of heart these many years?
Does faith begin to fail? Is hope departing?
And think you all in vain your falling tears?
Say not the Father has not heard your prayer;
You will have your desire sometime, somewhere.

Unanswered yet? No, do not say ungranted;
Perhaps your work is not yet wholly done.
The work began when first your prayer was uttered,
And God will finish what He has begun.
If you will keep the incense burning there,
His glory you will see sometime, somewhere.

Ophelia G. Browning

Hold On

From Streams in the Desert this week:

But he who Jesus holds through all,

Will stand, though Heaven and earth should fall.

Hold on! An end will come to sorrow;

Hope from the dust will conquering rise;

The storm foretells a summer's morrow;

The Cross points on to Paradise;

The Father reigns! So cease all doubt;

Hold on, my heart. Hold on, hold out.

Thoughtful

This week, I received an awesome package in the mail from Jess. It was wrapped up so cute...I just had to take a photo.

Axl had to check it out to make sure it was suitable for me to open. Maybe I should put him to use as a bomb-sniffer...? He's already been fired from keeping the squirrels away at Adam's parents house...we'll keep searching for a use for him.

Jess and I have been emailing back and forth, she's been so helpful and supportive throughout these months since we lost the baby. I'm always amazed at how thoughtful she is, in spite of her own grief. I'm sure she doesn't want any recognition for this :) but I couldn't resist. She sent me a sweet note:

And two devotionals that have been helpful for her since Cora went to be with Jesus. The one on the left is specifically for people dealing with loss, and I'm excited to continue reading it.

Thanks so much Jess!

A verse from this morning's chapter:

"He shot his arrows deep into my heart. The thought of my suffering and hopelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: the unfailing love of the Lord never ends! By his mercies we have been kept from complete destruction."

-Lamentations 3:13, 19-22